We Said Goodby To Doris.

Yesterday was Doris' memorial. Not much celebrating on my part. I met family that I have not seen since my wedding in 1990, as well as other family that I have never met. All 40 of us crammed into her small 800 square foot home. It was a beautiful day, which was appropriate.

It's so hard to be pleasant and upbeat especially around strangers when I just could not help but to notice the chair that Doris would sit in every day. Nobody sat there our of respect I'm sure.



We all shared memories and funny stories. My observation was whenever we would spend the weekend at her house, I'd offer to head to Starbucks for coffee and Doris would say, "I have some Taster's Choice in the cupboard if you want coffee". She didn't get that it was just fun going there. For coffee??

When almost everyone said their goodbyes and exchanged email addresses, my brother-in-law walked her urn down to the water's edge near the tide pools and interred her ashes into the sea. The same was done 21 years ago with her husband passed. We all shared a moment of silence, like we all instinctively knew that was proper procedure. I stood for a good solid 15 minutes without saying a word. And honestly, I have no words. Just a deep sense of loss.

I miss her so much. In spite of the fact that she was 93, dealing with pain from aging everyday, was going to remain bedridden for the rest of her life after her massive stroke, I can't help feeling the sorrow for what was.

Unfortunately this will not be the last painful event for our family. We received some more bad news Friday, but I choose not to post at this time. So is it 2009 yet?